Realizing your Self-Worth

For whatever reason, I have always been the relationship expert (or at least that's what it seems when it comes to relationships other than my own)! But seriously, I am the person who many come to since I am seemingly ALWAYS in a relationship. I've even been called a serial monagamer. At any rate, I do feel like relationships are not that hard...wait, don't get me wrong, they are PLENTY hard work, but I don't think that they are they hard to decipher. For one, I think that there are far too many "one-sided" relationships. You know what this is...she's in a relationship with him but he's not in one with her, and vice-versa. I believe that all of this would be eradicated if people just knew their self-worth.
All too often, I will come across a young lady who yearns for the attention of a particular guy. He doesn't want to give her the REAL attention she craves (which is that of a relationship), so she settles for the temporary attention and time he is willing to spend with her (which usually only involves bedding her and calling when he has nothing or no one else to do). This is so sad to me, and for the life of me they can't figure out why. It is because you don't respect yourself enough to tell him that you will not be his booty call. It is because you allow yourself to be his option when you've made him your priority. It is because you allow him to come over after he's left the club at 4 am every time and you guys haven't even been out on a real date, yet he can identify every picture on the wall of your bedroom. It is because you'd rather have him for those 3 hours that he wants to hit you up, and you are afraid to tell him no. Well, baby, I have news for you. If someone likes you, they will work for you. You can tell them no, and they will try to find a time that best accommodates you both. When someone likes you, they will go above and beyond to make you feel good...not dirty or used. When someone likes you, their actions speak far louder than their words. It's really not that hard to figure out. YOU just have to figure out how much you love yourself...will you allow yourself to be used?! Stand tall and shake it off if he doesn't want to call you in daylight hours, forget her if she doesn't like you because you're "too nice", tell him to drop dead if he only wants to come see you after "she's" denied him. It is all okay...because they are NOT the person for you anyway. And if you only loved yourself and knew your worth, you will actually be offended (not hurt) at the audacity of these people!
Now...that was all about pseudo-relationships, but I have a word about the people who are engaged in committed relationships as well. I need for you to ask yourself a question. Does he/she treat me like I need to be and/or deserve to be treated? Am I doing this all alone, does my significant other re-fuel me or energize me?! If you have asked these questions, and you came up with resounding "No's," then some re-evaluation definitely needs to take place. How can you and your partner create happiness if you are the constant driver, and never in the passenger seat? Relationships are up and down. They may be 50-50, 90-10, 60-40, etc at times...but what is the relationship doing for you? If you have taken issues that you have to your partner, but to no avail, then it may be time to walk out that door.

It's a beautiful affair when your partner can recognize the beauty in you, that even you can't see. When they motivate you to grasp your full potential. That partner is a rare find and definitely a gem. How much does your significant other cherish you? You are a King's kid, ya know? Your partner needs to breathe life into you, motivate you, inspire you, be your friend, be your backbone, not reproach you. If you're not getting these things, and it's been discussed and YOU stay...will you fault your partner for inflicting pain or will you fault yourself? The choice is yours. When people show you who they are...believe them. And when you love yourself and know your worth, you will accept nothing less than what you know you deserve and are entitled to. After all, "the minute we settle for less than we deserve, we get even less than what we settle for." So, remember...you are a king...and you ma'am, are a queen. Govern yourselves accordingly.